Self-Control versus Self-Esteem


Recently, I was in a discussion with one of my mentors on Healthy Lifestyle and at some point I told her my concerns with the guilt I feel sometimes when I do not give my kids ‘sweet food’…or allow them go to several ‘kids  party’ or ‘fun places’…or those things that are referred to as the ‘best of life’

I struggle with the thoughts that  ‘hope I am not depriving them of things they should be exposed to eat or visit that would make them feel confident amongst other Kid’s and build their esteem…

And then she asked me for a list of food I give them… Observing my list she said ‘these are healthy food, what else were you thinking you should be adding to their meal to build their sense of esteem?’

With a self-convicting smile, I mentioned ‘regular ice-cream, Meat/chicken pie, French fries, chinese restaurant, overseas trips etc’

She looked at me and asked, ‘So what if they eat all these foods and visit the best of fun places? What happens if they confidently sing out the names of these assorted foods and places yet the kids lack the skill to know when or whether to eat and not too? When or whether to react or not to? Should their esteem be determined by what they can have or what they chose to have?…

It was an eye opener for me…self control is a mother to self esteem. That is even as I focus to build the esteems of my little ones, my ultimate goal is to take them to the place of self control. No matter how much esteem or self confidence you have, you might be shocked at yourself on something you need to let go and you just couldn’t, at the way you respond to stimulants that you weren’t trained to manage self-excesses and to know when to say NO to SELF.

“All things are lawful but not all things are helpful, all things are permissible but not all things builds up” 1Corin 10:23

A great man is the one who had learnt to know and control him/her SELF.

I honor you

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